I have spent a lot of time in the last few years trying to retrain my brain to think differently and to find a way to live in positivity rather than negativity. I wanted to feel good more then I felt bad and I began to realize that I was my own worst enemy. The conversations we have with ourselves can be very negative and I often think of the saying “Misery loves company”. I believe it references the battles we have within our own minds. So how does a person tame the inner monster that talks shit? How do we monitor the thousands of thoughts we have every day?
I tried to cut out all negative thinking but came to realize quickly that monitoring each and every thought is exhausting and basically impossible. What is possible is being aware of how your series of thoughts is making you feel and redirecting those thoughts and feelings if you need to. Our brains seem to create a snow ball effect and our smallest of worries turn into the biggest of fears within our mind. The more aware we are about how we talk to ourselves the better.
The real change in my thoughts came when I bought a book that had a 28 day gratitude challenge inside. Each day was a new exercise to help move your mind from the negative to the positive. It was pretty simple stuff really. List 10 thinks you are grateful for every day. Go and find a rock and put it by your bed so that every night when you are ready to go to sleep you hold it, close your eyes, and find your favorite thing about the day. There were days that I had to really think to find the best part and it may have just been the hot coffee in the morning or maybe the ten quite minutes I got while in the shower or maybe it was simply that I woke up. There were exercises that worked on relationships. If we only focus on the things that bother us about someone that’s all you will see. And the longer you do that, the harder it becomes to salvage that relationship. It also had exercises to help look at money in a different way. If you always focus on not having enough money, you will continue to not have enough money. The basic concept throughout the book is that what you put out is what you get back. I have done and redone this gratitude challenge many times.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not perfect. Just the other day I stuck my tongue out at some woman who was rude to me. It was not my finest moment and I felt stupid after. Normally I would have smiled and tried to change the direction of the interaction but that day I resorted to my old self. I had allowed her to impact me in a negative way. The general direction of my thoughts has become positive and I try to be in constant gratitude for my amazing life. To be grateful for my home that rises up to meet me every time I pull in the driveway, for my family who supports me and the beauty of nature that surrounds me as I do live in one of the most beautiful places in the world.
So like Dr. Suess says, “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.”
